F. D. C. (Derek) Wijesinghe

The remains of Mr. Fitzroy Derek Christopher Wijesinghe were laid to rest on March 8, in the presence of a large gathering of fellow Christians, former professionals and officials, friends and relatives.

Mr. Wijesinghe, fondly known as Derek to all who knew him, was born on April 9, 1922, the eldest child of the late Francis Daniel and the late Gladys Wijesinghe, both of whom I remember from my childhood as devout and highly regarded persons.

Derek was a bright student at Royal College, where his father was a teacher. He obtained an external degree from the University of London in Economics and proceeded to serve his motherland in various capacities. He was a teacher at St. John’s College, Nugegoda; a Divisional Road Transport Officer in the Department of Motor Traffic, and a Research Officer in the Department of National Planning.

At the Department of National Planning, he worked under the eminent economist Dr. Gamani Corea, whom he held in high regard. Dr. Corea nominated Derek for a Rees Jeffreys Studentship in Transport Economics at the London School of Economics (LSE). This resulted in Derek’s postgraduate work on Transport Economics at LSE, under the doyen of British transport economists of that era, Gilbert J. Ponsonby.

He then obtained his master’s degree, M.Sc. (Econ.). Dr. Corea sent Derek as an economic advisor with the Ceylon delegation to the 21st session of the UN General Assembly in New York in 1966.

He held two executive positions in the private sector in Sri Lanka and served as a consultant economist at the World Bank, Washington DC, and continued as senior economist, specialising in commodities at the Commonwealth Secretariat in London.

Having served in two international organizations, he retired from active service and returned to Sri Lanka, where he continued his interest in economics and transport by serving as a member of the Fair Trading Commission.

More recently, he took a great interest in Health Economics and was instrumental in obtaining funding for the special care baby unit of the Castle Street Maternity Hospital. He was the second chairman of the Chartered Institute of Transport (CIT), UK (Sri Lanka section). During the formative period of the CIT (SL section), I had the privilege of associating with him in its establishment.

The institute, renamed the Chartered Institute of Transport and Logistics, is among the prestigious professional bodies in Sri Lanka. With his guidance, I became its chairman during the conflict period in Sri Lanka in the late 1980s, when transport was a high-risk commodity.

In fact, the day I was inducted as chairman there was a threat to public transport, and Derek was among the handful who attended the induction ceremony, along with the then Minister of Transport. Derek was a soft-spoken, articulate and focused contributor. He believed that “being on time for a meeting is actually being five minutes late.” This he manifested in his professional, official and spiritual obligations.

He was a practising, God-fearing Christian. His sincerity, integrity and honesty were recognised by his peers and subordinates. On a personal note, I owe him a debt of gratitude, as officer at the Registry of the Maradana Technical College. The day after my GCE 0/Level results in 1959, he gave me an application form to enrol as a Junior Technical Officer (JTO), and this laid the foundation for my career in tertiary education.

In his latter years, when I would visit him in his home and meet him at gatherings, he would recall the early days. On my last visit a few months ago, he was very concerned about me and kept asking, “Now where are you?” When I visited him in hospital to say goodbye, before going on an overseas trip, he had his usual gentle smile. He opened his eyes and acknowledged my presence. I am consoled that he breathed his last just when I returned to our motherland, which we both valued, and I was able to pay my last respects.

May his spiritual and exemplary life, unique characteristics, integrity remain with all of us who valued and respected him.

Dayantha Wijeysekera

He gracefully trod the minefield of politics

Rupa Karunatilleke

"I think my innings is coming to an end. I have a few singles to score before I wind up. That's not to say I have scored heavily in sixes and fours. An occasional boundary or a six may have graced my innings but essentially I was content taking the singles and doubles." That's how he summed up his life choosing to draw the similes from the game of cricket which he loved so much. And he said this about three months before his death in such a cheerful manner, it forced a smile on the faces of all who were beside him.

At Elpitiya, his home town, hundreds gathered to pay their respects to the man they loved very much. He had finished his innings gracefully a few days ago. Many observed a noticeable feature in this crowd. That they belonged to all sections of the political divide and were present to show how much they loved and respected the man. Perhaps the best tribute paid to a life lived without malice towards none.

At his Elpitiya residence along the corridor where people lined up, hung some vintage photographs of Rupasena Karunatilleke, better known as Rupa. I casually asked some schoolchildren if they knew the famous personalities who were in those photographs with Rupa. They did not. Only a few adults managed to identify Pundit Jawaharlal Nehru. The brilliance of Dr. Sarwapalli Radhakrishnan, the highly respected Rajendra Prasad and the well known charisma of Nehru appeared to have lost their value in a society beset with the veneration of the filthy lucre and pettiness in all its aspects. Had Rupa been there, I am sure he would have said, “Don't complain, Time passes by and so does everything including values".

At the funeral ceremony, speaker after speaker, both from the clergy and other, and from both sides of the political divide, spoke vehemently stressing on one quality Rupa possessed. That he was a gentleman to the core and gracefully trod on minefield of politics mindful of two important elements - decency and honesty. Dr. Sarath Amunugama delivering his eulogy quoted a famous sloka in Sanskrit that extols the virtues of being a gentleman and what it takes to be a gentleman. Rev Baddegama Samitha addressing the vast gathering, went to the extent of saying that he saw a similarity between Rupa's conduct in politics and that of what the great Dr. Ambedkar wanted a politician to be. Sadly both the Sanskrit soloka and the very name Dr. Ambedkar were lost on the majority of the gathering.

Rupa came from a very distinguished and wealthy family in Niyagama, Elpitiya. He had his early education at Mahinda College and later at Nalanda College. Though he did not quite make the academic grade or excel in any sport, he had been the self-appointed first eleven cricket team manager at Nalanda, accompanying the team almost in all of its matches. This used to be recounted by Stanley Jayasinghe, whenever the two met. Rupa took to business and as a kind of a vocation went into politics as was customary then. Dudley Senanayake was impressed by his oratorical capacity and had offered him the post of organizer for the UNP at Bentara Elpitiya.

His close relative and friend the late Rev. Mapalagama Vipulasara introduced him to the famous Indian political giants and the photographs mentioned above were taken in those moments. I asked him what it was like meeting the great philosopher and the second president of India, Dr. Sarwapalli Radhakrishnan. His reply was that he had a feeling of awe posing with the great man but he felt virtually magnetized in the presence of Shri Jawaharlal Nehru. His enthusiasm to discuss these very nostalgic moments showed very clearly his respect for greatness.

He successfully continued and expanded his family business whilst engaging in politics. He never got the priorities and ethics of the two mixed up. Always mindful that his reputation and that of his family was at stake, he very carefully negotiated the difficult terrain of political power. He was not corrupt and never allowed anyone under him to be corrupt either. He always said that the administration of public funds is sacred as much as the handling of income from religious institutions.

A lover of cinema and theatre, he could almost describe by rote the various songs and scenes of famous Hindi films and the names of actors who took part. Maname and Sinhabahu were his chosen best in the Sinhala theatre. However, his interest in aesthetic works took a backseat after his involvement in politics. 
He liked to indulge in the luxury of a good cigar. I have heard him saying very often that it was the late President J.R. Jayawardene who gave him the best of cigars from his stock until he died. There was a regular set of friends who visited him in his retirement and the meetings were always joyful.

Rupa never spoke bitterly or in some degree of anger against anyone. A great human quality that kept him very relaxed. To grow old gracefully is a remarkable gift and Rupa was a splendid example of it. Those born on the dates that add up to number six are almost always very endearing and charismatic people, numerologists say. Rupa was born on the 15th of March.

All good things must come to an end. Strangely, in the present day, it seems that only the good things are coming to an end almost perceptibly. The bad things just take a brief break and continue with added vigour. Dr. Ranjith Atapattu, Health Minister of the late President Jayawardene's cabinet summed up the whole scenario quite humorously when he addressed the funeral gathering. It was a poignant speech, perhaps the most sincere goodbye Rupa got from a political associate.

Rupa had a mission to complete when he was born into this world like any other. I can say he fulfilled it to the best. That he did it in style is the crowning factor. President Jayawardene said at the end of his term that he did it his way, repeating the words of Frank Sinatra. I guess Rupa did it in his own way too. 
Goodbye, Sir. You were a lovely man. The kind of man I would walk miles to meet up with should I get another chance. You were not a great politician or even a great entrepreneur. There were no airs and graces about you. You were a very lovable man and sincerity was written all over you. We will miss you. Your immediate family will miss you immensely. We could only offer to share their grief in the vain hope that the grief will wear out soon.

Parakrama Jayasinghe

Champion of the wronged, he was admired for his balanced thinking and integrity

Deepal Wijeratne

One feels a sense of hopelessness when confronted with the sudden loss of a friend who appeared one moment to be in good health, and was gone the next. This was how we felt when we heard of the sudden death of Deepal.

Just a few days before, Deepal was consoling me on the loss of my mother. We had a brief chat. He gave no indication that the next funeral I would attend would be his. At the Galkissa Cemetery, our sorrow knew no bounds when we saw Deepal’s little child playing by himself, oblivious of the funeral rites going on and the devastating blow that had been dealt to him.

The many mourners were all in a state of shock. Deepal was an energetic young man who was respected for his scholarly approach to work and the splendid results he produced, both in court and in relation to the disputes he handled for member companies of the Employers Federation.

He joined the Employers Federation of Ceylon (EFC) in 2001. He was a vital part of its legal and industrial relations service to the nation, and in particular the business community. He joined the EFC from the Attorney General’s Department, where he had established his name and shown his talent for advocacy, meticulous preparation and clarity of thinking.

So dedicated was he to his work that he neglected to seek medical attention for the headaches that were bothering him, and which turned out to be ominous warnings of a fatal illness. He was the third professional to die in harness at the EFC. The first was Mahadeva, the chief executive many years ago, and more recently, Diyanesh Rajaratnam.

I mention all this as most people do not realise how stressful a job the professional staff of the EFC have. When an an employee is dismissed, he has lost his means of living; strikes mean that disputes have reached proportions of hatred and violent behaviour; and disciplinary issues affect people and their futures. What the EFC professionals do is take on the headaches of others. Sometimes this turns out to be a thankless job.

Deepal did his demanding job with great acceptance and fairness. His death is a loss not only to the EFC and its members but to the whole community. Balanced thinking and integrity are hard to come by.

Franklyn Amerasinghe

Ammi, we cherish fond memories of you

Ramani Rupesinghe

It’s one year, since you passed away to glory darling Ammi. We know you are in our God’s Kingdom and may a thousand Angels sing praises to you for the wonderful life you gave us, especially your loving care to me your husband and our two daughters Sirani and Sriyanga.

Inspite of your sickness you prepared delicious meals, sewed and kept a beautiful home in addition to taking care of all of us. You were an inspiration and a teacher to all the young children in the vicinity of our home in Kotte, teaching them English from 2 p.m. till as late as 8.30 p.m.

You charged a nominal fee but for most it was free of charge. You even took them on educational tours to Kandy to visit the Dalada Maligawa, the Botanical Gardens and other places of interest, always preparing patties, cultlets, and sandwiches and providing drink for the children on these trips.

No one will forget your mouth-watering chocolate cake. Your equally tasty lamprais and Buriyani will also not be forgotten. Ammi you were a great seamstress too and infact a few days prior to passing away had started on some clothes for our two daughtersaying, “Thaththi I will finish these frocks when I am feeling better.”

You were not only an inspiration but also a blessing to our family in addition to your mother, brothers and sisters who were far away in Matale. Whenever you went there you used to prepare your delicious chocolate cake and other food varieties to take with you.

We miss you a lot and words cannot express the void we feel. But we find comfort that God has taken you to his Glorious Kingdom without any suffering or pain. I will never forget your last moments as you lay on my lap gazing at me with a smile while on the way to Sri Jayewardanapura Hospital.

You were a person who had immense faith in our Lord Jesus and I write these following words that were written and kept inside your Bible. “Lord Jesus, what you did for Lazarus, you can do for me too, if it is your will you can heal me?”’

Yes Lord Jesus you have healed our darling Ammi and taken her to your heavenly kingdom. 
We thank our Lord each time we think of you and when we pray for you.

Nimal Rupesinghe

Ratne Deshapriya Senanayake

Ratne Deshapriya Senanayake was a popular name of the 70s which slowly faded away from the political scenario after 1977. But, his political character would not fade away similarly. He was a man of many facets; a committed family man and humane political revolutionary with Marxist origins, who mixed Marxist ideologies with the aspirations of the common man, woven into a democratic focus. He was feared as a vehement politician, but in proximity, this was never observable.

He was the Deputy Minister of Planning and Employment under Prime Minister Sirimavo Bandaranaike. He in his gruff voice would swear punishment seeing fault, but it was nA leading light in social activitiesever executed. Instead, he showered advice on the defaulter.

He was a journalist who was a Deputy Editor of Lankadeepa and the Secretary General of the Afro Asian Writers’ Bureau; a live wire of the editorial team of Dinakara. He was our ambassador in China; a lawyer who did not fleece clients and a speaker who could address issues to be heard by everyone.

My first meeting with him was during the Dedigama by-election when his brother Dharmasiri Senanayake contested against Rukman Senanayke. Later I had the good fortune of working with him in Polonnaruwa from 1975 to 1977, as the Additional Government Agent. Our experiences with him are memorable; especially, when political character in society has now deteriorated to Kelaniya or Kolonnawa or Siri Kotha levels.

We the public officials had two wonderful MPs in Polonnaruwa- Leelaratne Wijesinghe and Deshapriya Senanayake. The two were different in certain aspects such as dress, language capabilities, firmness etc but had common attributes such as being humane, friendly, people-oriented etc. These commonalities and differences have remained as mixed attitudinal hallmarks of successor politicians from Polonnaruwa.

In retrospect I reminisce a few episodes among many. Deshapriya Senanayake [who was the final authority for the Decentralized Budget then] monitored it with GAs to ensure efficiency, effectiveness and economy of fund management for the wellbeing of the people, not only in Minneriya, but everywhere. His coordinating it at the District Coordinating Committee was so pleasant it gave us a great satisfaction to be working with a political leader like him.

He always had a personal approach in dealing with issues. Once he summoned me to Giritale circuit bungalow when Government Agent (GA) Amaradasa Gunawardena was away in India and asked me how the water shortfall in Parakrama Samudra could be resolved, irrespective of irrigation authorities’ rigid stipulations from Colombo. There was only one way; it was to become “terrorists” in water management by breaking the spills at Radavige Oya and “stealing” water. He wanted it done and repairs made afterwards for which I had the concurrence of an obliging Engineer.

I obliged. Deshapriya Senanayake did not mind breaking rules and regulations or spills for the greater good of the farmers.

The next week he thanked me for resolving the problem. I was told by his Private Secretary and journalist late Karunaratne Saputhanthri, who was killed by terrorists when the plane he was travelling in was blown up, that a certain SLFP supporter from Medirigiriya had complained against me as I was taking action against him for underhand disposal of state land reservations in Kaudulu Weva Stage II. He was angered when Deshapriya Senanayake refused to take action against me and said “Sir, you can do politics with the Additional GA and not with us.” Deshapriya Senanayake had reportedly said, “For heavens sake get lost. He (meaning me) does more valuable service than you do in colonization in Stage II and in providing water, which are more important to the people than illegally disposing reservations!” He had his evaluation of everyone.

Were these good turns to the people and public officers what defeated him at the 1977 elections, or the wave of defeat against the incumbent government?

We felt that the Sirimavo Bandaranaike government would be defeated at the 1977 elections, which was proved when the UNP won with a 5/6ths majority. After completing the count of Polonnaruwa where H.G.P. Nelson won, I met Deshapriya Senanayake seated opposite the GA, vehemently insisting that he should proceed to Colombo through Minneriya. But we had information that his good work and humane qualities were to be ‘rewarded’ with physical assault at Minneriya.

The GA, as a last move told Deshapriya Senanayake, “Sir, for several years as District Political Authority you ordered me. But today I order you to go through Bakamuna for your own safety.” Though he was unwilling we had late Major (later Brigadier) Tissa Jayatunga who ensured with Police assistance that Deshapriya Senanayake proceeded to Colombo safely via Bakamuna. It was history repeated with the more or less comparable fate faced in 1970 by the late Minister C.P. de Silva who “created the new Polonnaruwa District,” when ‘outsider’ Deshapriya Senanayake won.

I was GA Polonnaruwa for two years. In those two years he telephoned me only once –to tell me that a very qualified candidate was being discriminated in the appointment of Marriage Registrars and request justice be done. I did what he wished, as it was a rightful demand. He understood the difficulties faced by public officers in standing against a very strong government and was not a bother at any moment- when in power and out. Personally speaking I remember him as an extremely sociable personality.

There was always a dinner or lunch invitation when he was around. Of course, Leelaratne Wijesinghe went a step further and always had some delicious dish or two prepared to add to the cuisine, especially on circuits to places like Yakkure, where the Maduru Oya Scheme stands now. Those added to satisfying our taste buds especially in Yakkure when we had Mudiyanse Iskolemahattaya’s kurakkan pittu and curd, which Deshapriya Senanayake relished.

Once I was hosting him and some officers from the Kachcheri for dinner at home and we were in high spirits by about 10 p.m. when a man walked into my house and sought his intervention in a land dispute. Deshapriya Senanayake verbally ‘blasted’ him. “This is not the time to discuss land matters though I am with DLOs, the GA and Additional GA. They too should relax at home. Go to the Kachcheri tomorrow and make representations.” As soon as the man left, he said “Please look after that fellow’s case. But he shouldn’t have come here to tell his grievances. He should have come to Giritale.” I am confident the intruder heard him. That was Deshapriya Senanayake. No wonder we loved him; people loved him.

Quite recently I dreamt of him and I called Gloria Senanayake, his amiable wife and told her that I dreamt of him and promised to visit him, which I could not fulfil. But I do not regret it much because had I gone he would have revisited old memories that could not have been communicated, and he would have been sad since he was not communicating with visitors during the last days of his life, as I learnt from Gloria. It would have been equally painful for me to see a great communicator silent, as I experienced on January 22, seeing his lifeless body laid in a coffin.

His life was full of lessons to everyone in humane politics and if learnt and practised by present day and future politicians it would be the best tribute paid to a great gentleman politician. Due to a change in the political environment this may be a tough challenge.

May Ratne Deshapriya Senanayake attain the supreme bliss of Nibbana.

Austin Fernando

A leading light in social activities

Gilbert Jayawardana

Gilbert Jayawardana of Bogahawatha Road, Pannipitiya passed away recently. He was a prominent figure who took part in many social activities in the area. As a Buddhist he lent a helping hand to the Buddhist temples of the area.

He hailed from Induruwa, down South and built a home close to my residence. Mrs. Jayawardana also passed away recently. Mr. Jayawardana was a kind-hearted person who led a simple life. We were saddened by his sudden death. May he attain the supreme bliss of Nibbana.

M.G. Asoka Karunaratne

A husband who cannot be forgotten

Victor Fernando

Three years have passed since that sad day. My husband passed away on January 22, 2009. It is difficult to express my sadness without him. He was my companion and friend whom I looked upto for advice and assistance. He fulfilled his duties towards the family. He was such a loving father to our three daughters. He fully accomplished his mission in life.

He loved music so much that he wanted the three daughters to learn music. Our eldest daughter is at present the music teacher of St. John’s Balika at Panadura. He always wanted me to be with him. I cannot understand how he left me. He left us all for God’s call cannot be ignored. I am sure that he is still looking after us from heaven above.

May you rest in peace

Your wife, Josephine Fernando

For the past 30 years or more, Abeydeera worked hard to make a difference to the life of the “plain people”. His sensitivity and concern towards the less privileged was such that he made maximum use of the Sri Lanka Canada Development Fund, which later came to be known as Sri Lanka Centre for Development Fund, to set individuals and communities on the path of self -reliance.

Throughout his tenure as Executive Director of the SLCDF, he did what he enjoyed doing best -- working for the people. He did not care about the battering his ‘physical being’ was taking in the process; he continued regardless of the physical wear to his system which was to soon become irreparable.

One moment he was there and the next he was gone. The firm hand of death took him away and left a number of people ‘destitute’ and sad. The one phrase heard with unmitigated poignancy amongst those who came to pay their last respects to Abey at the funeral was – “Oh! He was a good man”. That sufficed to be the epitaph for a man who wanted no recognition from anyone and no return for the work he did either from his beneficiaries or from his benefactors.

Ever polite and humble in his demeanour, he was as those of his ilk are wont to be. He made no attempt to cultivate or to look for patronage from politicians, the elite or the powerful. He cared not for the rich; nor did he bother to amass wealth for himself. He remained to the end, the simple man that he was when he started the long march of his life in this job.

Yet no part of his fund was ever moved to please anyone except those that came within the project criteria laid out for the management of the fund. Had he wanted he could have made the connection with the rich and the powerful with the finances he ‘controlled’. What better tribute can one offer to a man who remained steadfast to his principles to the end.

Ethnic differentiation was not a note he played on. To him the Sinhalese, the Tamils and the Muslims were all a part of the human race to be treated with equal respect and consideration. He knew no other cause except those of the downtrodden who came into his orbit. The Buddhists, Christians, Hindus and the Muslims had no special resonance with him. They too were just a part of the whole and his interest was with the whole and not with the differentiated segments in society.

I think his early leanings towards left politics made him attuned to empathize with the disadvantaged within the Sri Lankan system, a credo that guided him throughout his life. He, however, kept his political leanings to himself to maintain neutrality. Abey was above all, a man of integrity and in his convictions no man could cross swords and succeed. He was also a very private man who therefore kept social interactions to what was absolutely essential to his work. A man of few words but a man of his word, Abey will be missed by all those who knew him, understood his nature and appreciated his worth.

His smile, when it came, spread to his face in sincerity and made you aware of his friendship for you. The smile is gone and the man is gone. But the memories of him will remain with his associates. 
Our hope is that time will bring solace to his wife Nina and their two sons. May they have consolation in the thought that in the small space he occupied he was a giant amongst men. He remained and died an independent man.

May he rest in peace!

Gnana Moonasinghe

Looking back on a dear friendship of almost 80 years

M. S. RANATUNGA

The first death anniversary of M. S. Ranatunga (Rane) of Thimbirigasyaya Road, Colombo 5, was commemorated with a sermon (bana) delivered by a Buddhist monk on November 19, 2011, and an almsgiving (dhaana) offered to a representative group of Buddhist monks the following day. 
Even after one year, I cannot reconcile myself to the fact that a dear friend for nearly 80 years has passed away, although the Dhamma teaches us that everything in this universe is impermanent, not excepting life.

We studied at Mahinda College, Galle. Except for a couple of years during the infant stages of our school career, we were classmates throughout. We remained loyal friends until death took him away last year.

Rane hailed from a remote hamlet in Galle, while I was from the town. He spent most of his spare time with books, while I used mine for activities, such as playing games, cricket especially. We had one thing in common – we both came from large families, not less than a dozen members in each family!Rane got excellent results at the senior school certificate examination in 1945, and was exempted from the London Matriculation.

He entered the University of Ceylon from the Pembroke Academy of Colombo, offering an unusual combination of subjects: Botany, Chemistry, Physics and Geography. In 1951, he obtained a second class honours degree in Botany, which earned him the prestigious appointment as a Deputy Conservator in the Forest Department.

By a strange coincidence, we both proceeded to the UK in 1951 for further education. Rane studied at the Commonwealth Institute of Forestry, affiliated to the University of Oxford, with collegiate status at Balliol College. He obtained a Bachelor of Science, leading up to a Masters later on. I studied at the University of Durham Dental Faculty.

During our years in the UK we kept in touch. In the late summer of 1952, I met him in London on his return from Paris, where he had attended a seminar arranged by the University of Oxford. Again, one weekend in 1953, he made his first ever dental appointment with me at the New Castle-upon-Tyne Dental Hospital. Eventually, he and his family would become my loyal patients. Also, we shared a few memorable days sightseeing as far north as Edinburgh.

Rane was always mindful of the welfare of his family – both nuclear and extended. So much so that family life left him with little time for his friends and other social obligations. Rane and Swarna (who died in 1998) brought up their children and grandchild in exemplary fashion. The children received a sound professional education, and they and their spouses hold highly responsible posts in corporate bodies. His getting through the difficult months following his wife’s demise and his illness in his last few years was possible because of the unstinting care of his children and their spouses.

This appreciation would be incomplete without reference to the multitude of services Rane rendered. Had he remained in the Forest Department, he would have ended up as Conservator of Forests. However, necessity demanded that he be appointed General Manager of the Timber Corporation. One thing led to another, and before you knew it the Food and Agriculture Organisation had appointed him as a consultant, and stationed him in Nepal.

A whole year has passed since Rane left us. Writing this appreciation wasn’t easy. My wife and our four children share my grief. Battling the vicissitudes of life, eventually we fail – all of us. Your beloved friend Wimal has only one last wish for you, sweet prince:

Rane, may you attain Nibbane.

Dr. W. G. Wimaladharma

Honourable brother-in-law was a model of integrity, hard work and pragmatism

S. MAHALINGAM

S. Mahalingam, my only brother-in-law, is no more. He passed away in his sleep at his home in Karaveddi on Saturday, December 17, 2011. On hearing the news of his demise, our hearts skipped a beat and the blood rushed to our heads. The reaction of my wife, his only sister, cannot be described in words.

My association with Mahalingam goes back to our boyhood days. He was a close relative. My father and his father were bosom buddies from childhood and kept up their healthy relationship till the end of their lives.

Out of an abundance of love and affection for his sister, Mahalingam readily agreed to an exchange marriage, although he had not seen my sister, who was living in Jaffna. My marriage to Mahalingam’s sister took place on May 12, 1961, and his marriage to my sister took place a year later, on August 19, 1962. Defying the common belief that exchange marriages seldom work out, both our marriages blossomed. My wife and I have four children, three boys and a girl. Mahalingam had five children, three girls and two boys, and all the children are living overseas and doing well. My children too are doing well.

Mahalingam had vast knowledge, and industry and energy were embedded in his personality, making him a master of word and deed. He was a voracious reader. He was a good writer, with a compelling style – modern, vigorous, dynamic. He wielded the pen as if it were a sword. He was reputed for his appreciations and letters to the editor on matters of public interest. I was expecting him to write an appreciation of me, but fate has decreed that I should write an appreciation of him.

He was a stickler for accuracy, and he had a gift for lucid expression. His life was a model of integrity, hard work and pragmatism. He was strictly honest and he never minced words. He never swerved from the path of duty. He could be quick tempered, but he was lucky to have a good wife (my sister) who used the “remote control” within her to calm him down.

Behind every successful man stands a woman. An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, the Bible says. Mahalingam was a very happy family man – a devoted husband, a loving father, a loving brother, and an understanding relative.

He was very fond of his sister (my wife). He had a family photograph of my family in his room. After his funeral, my sister gave the photograph to my wife, who was pleasantly surprised. She cried out, saying “What a great man my Anna was!"

The younger generation is often indifferent to ageing parents and consider them a burden. Mahalingam’s children came from Canada and the UK and performed the funeral rites. They are grateful children.

Mahalingam was extremely religious. He was always visiting the two Pillayar temples in Karaveddi. He observed the most sacred Kanthasaddy fast every year for 35 years. He lived a full life, exceeding the Biblical span. He enjoyed being with his 10 grandchildren.

Mahalingam’s life and work can be best summed up in a line from Horace:
“Justum et tenacem propositi virum” – A man upright and tenacious of purpose.
Om. Shanthi! Shanthi!

V. Vimalarajah

Touched by a kind mother-in-law

NORMA DE SILVA

As I sit down in a distant land and think of you I can't believe 15 years have lapsed since you left us. You are never far away from our thoughts. I got to know and love Aunty Norma when I first joined the family by marrying her second son. I will never forget how she cried at our wedding and I suppose she thought she was going to lose her son but what happened was quite different.

She warmly welcomed me to her family and from that moment a friendship and affection grew between us. We were always there for each other in good times and bad. We had such great times. Fond memories of those days will never be forgotten. They never fade away.

Aunty Norma had a personality that touched everyone who knew her. She was kind and caring and had time to listen to everyone. Although she had a busy social life, she found time to talk to the green leaves seller who would come to her door, the vendor and butcher at the market.

She was a good wife who was always there for Uncle Joe. She was also a loving mother and wonderful grandmother who loved her family. Many are the little things she did with her grandchildren which will be cherished by them forever. She was always full of fun and laughter.

One striking quality about Aunty Norma was her faith. Her faith gave her the strength even in troubled times. During her illness when she suffered so much of pain her faith gave her the strength to go on. 
Fifteen years have gone by and many things have changed. Many are the success your children and grandchildren have achieved through the years.

You would have been truly proud of them. My only regret is that you are not with us to share these moments but I guess God knew best. He saw you in so much of pain and took you home. You will always live vividly in the minds and hearts of those you have touched by your rare and special qualities.

Time and tides change but our beautiful memories will last forever. As Tagore says "Death is not extinguishing the light, it is only putting out the lamp because the dawn has come."

Sunila